Comparison (2)
不久前,在这里发表了一篇文章,说的是在澳洲逗留几年,所感受到的一些文化上和生活上的不同。
在文章编辑好之前,听到同事在公司跟老板说一些几年前,她刚从印度抵达大马的经验。那时,突然间觉悟说,在我们对一些不熟悉的方式和习惯感到讶异或难以了解时,在他人眼中,我们不也一样吗?
那时有个念头,就是也想听听别人怎么说我们。事先声明,这不是要挑起什么种族的纷争或把之间的差异放大,只是想要有多一点的互相了解而已。
在此要特别谢谢:
- 一位大学朋友 SW Thoo(她原自怡保,现在仍在澳洲居住和工作)
- 两位在悉尼土生土长、父母却是来自亚洲国家的前同事Chris和Mel

我想再强调一次。他们所说的,是他们察觉到的差异,不是说每一样都令他们很惊讶、难以接受或觉得讨厌。当然,也不是要分谁对谁错。
SW的看法:
- Greet people by kissing on their cheek.
涵:第一次经历时,也是有点吓到。后来就比较可以应对自如了。 - Drink on Friday night on the dot after working hours till midnight... without eating anything.
涵:很多时候,他们一有酒,就可以忘记很多其他东西。那里的酒,也没这里的贵。 - Most of the shops are close at night or will close pretty early.
涵:去欧洲的时候,也是有相同的经历,因为西方人都蛮注重休息的时光及与家人的相聚。有一次圣诞节时去露营,想要租个快艇(租半天),那老板竟然不要做我们的生意,因为他说,中午的时候,他正和家人欢庆佳节,不想中途出来收艇。最后,确保了他黄昏时已经庆祝完毕,我们就向他租整天。在同样的情况下,亚洲人多会抱着“难道有生意不做吗?”的心态,不管怎样都不会拒绝一单生意。
Chris:在一些公共假期如复活节、Queen's birthday的时候,澳洲商店都是关的,而亚洲商店都会营业。在华人新年或中秋节时,情况却相反(澳洲商店都有营业,而亚洲商店都关门)。 - Most of the food are frozen.
涵:赞同。在那里没什么看到“湿巴杀”(wet market),也没有看过有人当场斩肉,把血淋淋的部分高挂,更不会看到有人卖那些还会叫、还会走的禽类。 - The elders do not expect to be taken care by their next generation.
涵:以往看到视力已经很不好的老婆婆,还要一个人搭巴士,衣服上扣着一个写了“Vision Impaired”的牌子,觉得很心酸。在超级市场,也是有遇过行动不太方便(所以动作和脚步都很慢)的老人,独自去购物。我走在她后头,她不小心把东西弄跌了,我帮她拾起来,然后她轻轻地跟我说谢谢。我不记得我是否看到她老去和虚弱的脸庞及微笑。那时我在想,为什么他们的孩子,不陪他们一起来? - Female students are allowed to wear mini skirt to school.
涵:发型方面,也是没多大的限制。假期时,他们也没有堆积如山的假期作业。
Chris:在亚裔占大多数的地方,迷你裙的观念比较难被接受,也不被鼓励。澳洲人对这不太介意,反正不是短得太过分就行了。 - There is no seating number in the cinema.
Chris:已经开始要实行对号入座了! - Not many Australians use the hand-brake in their car.
…… 我们俩都没什么说,好像没什么注意到这一点 …… - Australians are crazy for cricket.
涵:这就像美国人爱棒球,大马人爱羽球。 - Teachers are not allowed to touch the students, else it can be reported as sexual harassment.
Chris:这是最近的事。政府确实说过,老师不可以打学生或有什么身体接触。 - Different states have different education systems; every school has its own uniform.
Chris:曾说过要统一全国的考试或教育制度,可是有太多反对的声音。 - Australians are outdoorsy – they absolutely love beach and the tan.
涵:在前公司,没有人说或批评过我皮肤黝黑,可是现在,就完全不同。但这才证明,我目前身在一个确确实实的亚洲国家。以前Chris早上骑18km的脚车(耗时约90分钟,因为有很多红绿灯)去上班,而且他不是唯一这么做的同事(不过幸好全都是男的)。他们骑到满身大汗,到了公司才换衣。那时我也是觉得他们很疯狂!
Chris:也不是说全部澳洲人都那么热爱户外活动,但若和亚洲人比起来,确实更胜一筹。
SW的意见,是从一个大马人的观点出发。
至于前同事的说法,则是澳洲人和亚洲人的一些分别(悉尼有好多亚裔)。前同事们本身,有着亚洲人的样貌、血统,可是却在澳洲土生土长。当你有点疑惑地想询问他们的身份时,他们会笃定、骄傲的说,I’m an Australian。基本上,只要听听他们说出口的英文,就可以知道。
- Chris的见解 -
Beliefs - Asian people are quite superstitious or hold beliefs more than Australians, e.g. Feng Shui in homes, good luck words on the walls, not putting up portraits of living people, lucky/unlucky numbers ... some things that my mum believes in include shaving a new born baby's hair after 30 days (because the old hair is "dirty"), not opening umbrellas inside the house (bad luck), or cutting your nails at night (bad luck again).
涵:没话说,他讲得没错,虽然我还是会在屋顶下开伞或在夜间剪指甲。
Smoking - A lot of Asian people I know who smoke tend to smoke menthol cigarettes. Maybe this is big in Asian countries, or maybe they like the taste, but I observed this because my ex-girlfriend was an Asian and liked to smoke menthol cigarettes, and when I go to Asian countries I can smell the same...
涵:我不太清楚,因为很讨厌烟,所以不曾想要去知到别人抽的是什么烟,也没有太多烟民朋友。会尝试去问,但不肯定会得到答案。
Work approach - most Asian people do not like to be confrontational with colleagues/seniors, or speak up if they're unhappy with something. Australians don't like to be confrontational either, but they tend to become involved in them more often. Australians are often encouraged to speak up if unhappy. Having said that - I've heard Singaporeans are very open and confrontational with their work...
涵:这是我回来这里工作之后,其中一个最强烈的感慨!很对很对,我必须举手举脚赞成!
Family & living – Australians tend to move out at the first opportunity, for a variety of reasons, wanting independence, don't get along with parents etc. Asian people tend to not move out until much later, or until they get married. This is similar for Greek and Italian people as well. Asian people also tend to look after their parents when they're older, whereas with Australians, nursing homes, retirement villages are avenues that are often taken.
涵:西方人比较没有孝亲敬老的观念,这是无可厚非的。这与之前SW提及的不谋而合。
Sniffling/sniffing - This is something Nic brought to my attention sometime last year, but apparently a lot of Asian people sniffle and sniff. Like when they have a cold, or just normally.... you can hear them going *sniffle!.....sniff!* every few seconds. I haven't noticed this with Aussie people too much. I'm not sure if this is a cultural thing, because I know with Japanese people, it's considered rude to blow your nose in public. But yeah, since Nic first mentioned it, I've started to notice it too.... :P
涵:我也没有什么注意到。但从今以后会比较注意!
MSN - I've noticed a lot of Asian people I chat with online - they like to use heaps of flashy emoticons, like bouncy balls, stars, "~~~", etc for over 50% of their words. They also use ^_^ or =) for smiley faces, where other people I speak with simply use :)
涵:老实说,我也不明白为什么。尤其是在friendster里头,那些什么符号加数目字加英文字母,或大写又加小写,确实令人眼花缭乱!

- Mel的三言两语 -
- They tend to talk loud and don’t realize it's rude
涵:澳洲人说得兴起时,也会很大声。但若是在一些好像图书馆的地方,相较澳洲人,亚洲人就比较会不小心、不解风情地大声起来,不自觉地成为焦点。 - They push on the train especially when it's packed and they know that lots of people are getting out at the next stop.
涵:其实每个人都难免有些推挤、碰撞,尤其是火车上超多人的时候。或许亚洲人的脚步比较快,神情比较紧张,让人有比较粗鲁的错觉? - They don't know the meaning of a queue.
涵:这是排队方式的不同。在澳洲,是排一排而已,哪一个柜台(比如说在邮政局、银行)或厕所空了就去哪一个。不像这里,每个柜台或厕所外面,都各有一条长龙。 - Asian women are the worst drivers - very embarrassing.
涵:或许不只是亚洲女性吧。这种情况,在大马应该已是见惯不惯!我自己也有发觉到,在大马驾车时,我的脾气是比较暴躁的,而且常是抱着“让人?你让了他,他也不会感谢你”这种心态来驾车。好可怕! - All Asians own a Toyota Camry.
涵:就好像澳洲人喜欢Holden那样!
Mel今天刚给我回复。信末,她跟我说,下星期她将启程到欧洲去,然后会在那里旅游长达六个星期,所以现在感觉很振奋。顿时,我又想到了一个差异,就是亚洲人和西方人,对旅行的观点和看法。
在西方人眼中,大学毕业后和开始工作前,大多都会选择去背包旅行,认识不同的国度和体验另一种生活,然后才开始投身社会工作。在亚洲,不少刚毕业的年轻人,都迫不及待地找工、开工,因为要赶快开始赚钱。就算已经工作了,别人知道你要拿一个月去旅行,也会觉得不可思议,觉得你恨奢侈,觉得你很不会想。
我一直摸不着头脑。去旅行,到底有什么不对?

我的一名前同事(是澳洲人),虽然他在真正毕业前就投入工作,但工作一年后,他也是到南美洲背包旅行整个月。世足赛的时候,前公司的那个足球迷,也很潇洒地飞到德国去支持澳洲队。以往,我的前老板也聘请了几个到澳洲背包旅行的年轻人,有来自爱尔兰的,也有来自英国的。要做到几时,要什么时候再开始旅程,他们都可以自行决定。在老板的宽容下,他们也不会不负责任地留下一大堆手尾、拍拍屁股就走。
曾经在一本台湾杂志看到有个希腊人说,台湾人的想法,就是工作赚钱最重要,成功就是有钱。一说到玩,就变得很不好意思,好像整个文化都不鼓励你去玩。在希腊,周六、周日很多商店都关门,而台湾人却不会放弃这个赚钱的机会。
其实,很多时候我都在想,大马人和台湾人在这方面,想法的差异有多大?虽然我已经知道,有人会问说,你不赚钱,怎么可以去玩?
所以赚钱,还是最重要的!??
1/5/2007
2:39pm
P/S:真的没想到,在劳动节的今天,会写一篇如此结尾的文章。
5 comments:
你很介意别人批评你皮肤黝黑? 可能澳洲人只会分辨白人与黑人. 你这种不白不黑的,实在是难倒他们啦!
是那么介意的话,你早看到我消失匿迹了啦。或许我应该再问问旧同事,为什么没有如此批评我。再回复你。
ok. answer obtained:
"you are not too dark"
建议你下一篇写些关于中西融合后的优良文化。但,你千万不可以身做则,OK?
hmm.. interesting.. have never thought of this before.. will consider but dare not promise anything at the moment.. need to think of the approach to gather info.. thanks for suggesting anyway :)
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